


Bound

by EmotionalSupportPuma



Category: Elder Scrolls Online
Genre: Conversations, Friendship, Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Light Angst, One-Sided Attraction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-06-11
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:41:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24655522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmotionalSupportPuma/pseuds/EmotionalSupportPuma
Summary: Ciielyn has been many things; a thief, a smuggler, an assassin, but never a soldier. Perhaps Queen Ayrenn and Razum-dar have misplaced their trust this time around.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 2





	Bound

Nothing ever stays a secret for long in a thieves den. Perhaps Ciielyn should have seen this coming, that eventually her past would come knocking and there would be no hiding any longer. Although, admittedly, she had expected the Brotherhood to be the ones that tracked her down first. Leaving an organization like that was something that was hard to keep permanent unless you were dead.

The last face she had expected to track her down was that of a smug Khajiit with a stupid, red mohawk. Even before she saw him a pit had formed in her stomach. Instincts that Ciielyn hadn't had to rely on in a while rearing up to let her know something dreadful was coming. A hush had fallen over the far side of the Thieve's Den, an unfamiliar face prowling in the entryway. She wasn't quite sure how he'd talked his way that far while still in his Queen's Eye leathers, but Razum-dar was known for his silver-tongue. 

"He's dressed rather nicely. Almost as handsome looking as I am today." Walks-Softly murmured to the small gathering of people eyeing this intruder.

Quen tilted her head nervously, "That's an Dominion soldier, high-ranking at that, if I'm remembering correctly." 

"Whatsa soldier want with a bunch of thieves?" Silver-Claw asked.

As much as she wished to disappear, Raz had already spotted her. The eye contact was as firm as it was respectful. He wouldn't delve any further into this home of hers, but Ciielyn was going to come and have a word with him. No room for debate. 

"Not with the rest of ya." Ciielyn startled them all by speaking up, ochre eyes as dark and intimidating as ever, "Just with  _ me _ ."

In an instant every eye was on her, spitting dozens of questions through the air in only the way thieves could. Having to read on another at a glance was an integral skill, after all, when being quiet was of the essence. Ciielyn fixed her eyes resolutely passed them all. Stiffly brushing shoulders with Walks, she approached the entryway and dipped her head in greeting. All these years later and respect was still ingrained in every fiber of her being. She dimly hoped that the others wouldn't read into the motion as they, no doubt, scrutinized the entire interaction. 

"Bright moons." His voice scarcely rose enough to be audible.

"Bright moons."

"Been a long time, five-claw. You aren't an easy one to track down."

"Kinda the point." Ciielyn huffed with a subtle glance back to the cistern, "Speaking of which, what's yours?"

"Raz doesn't remember you being so impatient or so reserved." He tilted his head to the side.

Of course the right hand of the Queen would be observant at all times, enough so to remember someone he hadn't seen in years. Ciielyn grit her teeth and was careful to keep meeting his stare. She wasn't about to be intimidated on her own ground, not about to give away any more details about herself then she had to while prying ears listened. By the look on his face, Raz gleaned that information easily.

"Alright, this one will be quick. The Dominion needs your talents again." 

"For how long?" Ciielyn fought off a groan.

As soon as the words left her mouth a chorus of murmurs just low enough to be indiscernible sounded behind them. Raz curled his tail in amusement, leaving her to glare fruitlessly at him while she waited for the inevitable interruption. The person who did speak up startled Ciielyn into spinning on her heel. 

"What's going on here?" Zeira asked, voice stoney and cautious. 

Zeira had always been easy to read, surprisingly so for someone who led a band of thieves. The way her eyebrows remained scrunched despite the question showed her distrust of the stranger. The folding of her arms said that, while suspicious, she didn't think of Raz as a threat at the moment. But the hard glint in her eyes? That betrayed a thought that perhaps Ciielyn had brought a soldier here on purpose, that Ciielyn couldn't be fully trusted. She couldn't fight the way it made her heart sting with hurt. This was  _ her _ home as much as anyone else's.

When words failed her, Raz stepped in, "Nothing concerning your organization. We simply need to borrow your friend for a little while."

"We?"

"Queen Ayrenn, of the Aldmeri Dominion. She asked for Ciielyn by name." 

Zeira debated the truth of his words and just what that meant for them before replying, "Then I guess we know what the answer must be."

It sounded like resignation, or perhaps apathy, but Ciielyn knew her guild master better than that. Zeira knew what Razum-dar was doing when he mentioned the Queen. An unspoken threat, that if the Thieves Guild didn't cooperate, didn't allow her to leave for this trip, then maybe Dominion soldiers would stumble upon this safe space of theirs. There was little room for debate and every party here knew it. Ciielyn allowed herself a few moments to hate Raz, to hate the Dominion for pulling her away from this home she'd found.

But after that the feelings were bottled away again, to be expended at a later date. Preferably away from both the Thieves Guild  _ and  _ the Dominion. She'd become adept at this skill, sectioning of pieces of herself that were too ugly to inflict on those she'd grown to care about. Almost everything she'd learned with the Brotherhood fell into this category. It was the reason she was, as Raz had so eloquently pointed out, so reserved compared to her past self. Ciielyn the assassin was loud and wild and sadistic. Ciielyn the thief was soft-spoken, even-tempered and obedient. 

Cutting off pieces of herself to protect the others, that was what she was doing now, wasn't it? Carefully taking the Ciielyn she had crafted for the guild and bottling her up, so that she could go out and start killing again. Her heart beat excitedly at the prospect of  _ finally _ feeling alive for the first time in years. The rest of her trailed along bitterly, knowing that to feel alive was to forsake the home, the  _ family _ , she'd spent so long building. The Thieves Guild didn't kill unless it was  _ absolutely  _ necessary. But Ciielyn? She'd been born to kill, to wallow in death and to enjoy it. If they knew the real her, they'd never see her the same way again.

Zeira glanced over to her for the slightest of moments, but it was enough to convey her disappointment. The prospect of being tracked down by soldiers was something that should have been mentioned before now. She'd kept it a secret, her past, and now things would never quite be like they had been before. Dark eyes shifted to the side and locked on the other members of the Guild. Most of them refused to meet her gaze, despite the curiosity oozing from them. Her relationships with them would be changed by the time she returned too. Only one of them looked her in the eye.

Quen. Her partner in crime, the reason she'd been drawn into this life in the first place, her  _ friend _ . Well, Ciielyn kind of wished they'd become more than that. But for now her advances had been refused. Would their partnership be the same after she came back? Thieves didn't like soldiers. Quen stared at her as though she didn't quite recognize the Bosmer anymore.

"You're really leaving? Just like that?" She asked as another piece of Ciielyn's heart chipped away.

"Not forever, Quen." It wasn't hard to bottle up the wavering of her voice, she'd grown so adept at it by now, "Abah's Landing, the Thieves Guild...this is where I belong. Nothin' could make me forget that."

"But you're going to work for a Queen."

Ciielyn looked away, "Not by choice."

"Who's to say they won't just keep you there?" Quen asked even though it didn't sound much like a question.

For that she had no answer, or at least, no  _ truthful _ one. If the Dominion was willing to hunt her down once, what would keep them from doing it again? There were many ways to twist her service into something longer and longer. She owed her life to them and would likely owe it several times over by the time this was finished. And for every time that she owed them, her precious guildmates would be held at knifepoint. For now Queen Ayrenn may be on the amiable side for this recruitment, but how long until it became an unveiled threat? Be a soldier or all of your little criminal friends get the axe. Ciielyn felt the unmistakable tightening of this figurative noose around her neck.

Quen seemed to find her own answer in the silence and narrowed her eyes. For the briefest of moments she looked to be considering some sort of parting gesture, but ultimately decided against it and turned away without another word. Ciielyn vowed silently to make this pain up to her when- no,  _ if _ she returned. She was practical enough to know when she couldn't make a promise, even to nobody except herself. Walks murmured a hesitant farewell and even a couple other guild members joined in. The ones she valued the opinions of the most didn't say a word.

__

They scarcely made it out of the gates of Abah's Landing before Raz started needling her.

"You liked it there." 

"It's my home." Ciielyn stated simply.

"But you are not  _ you _ . Certainly you could get a job that allows you to kill." Razum-dar blinked and then sheepishly added, "This one means an upstanding one. Perhaps as a permanent soldier for the Queen?"

"You think every one of your enemies is a bad person deserving of death?"

"Perhaps not. An executioner then, someone who kills only the convicted."

"Bah, as if that means anything." She cocked her head with a sullen shrug, "I don't want to kill every day for the rest of my life. Even if it's the only way I'd ever feel alive."

"Could you not...find another way to be alive?"

"I wish. Fourteen is such a formative age to be told your only worth is as a criminal."

"Fourteen? That's…"

"Young for an elf? Yeah, but my parents didn't seem to mind kicking their child to the gutters at that age. I did what I had to, to survive."

"Raz is sorry."

For nearly an hour they traveled in silence. Razum-dar seemed to truly mean his apology, but that was a wound so long scabbed over that she didn't feel like dredging the feelings back up. She'd buried those feelings the same day she'd put her parents in the ground. And with everything else weighing on her mind, the abuse she'd put an end to was the last topic she wanted to ponder. Eventually Ciielyn spoke up again.

"What makes the Queen think I'll be any good as a soldier, Raz?" 

"She believes in this one." The Khajiit answered with little hesitation and a definitive twitch of his whiskers.

"What makes  _ you _ think I'll be any good as a soldier?"

He looked at her for a long moment before sniffing as though it were a stupid question, "You have a good heart and that's all this one cares about in an ally."

It would have been touching, and still was a tiny bit, if Ciielyn didn't hate what being a soldier implied. That her only redemption could be sought by unwaveringly following the Dominion. Raz seemed to realize how his words sounded and his dark ears flattened against his skull.

"This one doesn't mean to sound like he is buttering you up." He insisted, "And he certainly doesn't mean to keep you a soldier forever."

"But Queen Ayrenn might."

For a few moments Raz didn't answer and Ciileyn felt her stomach twist dismally. The truth in her words was like a knife to the gut. Eventually the Khajiit sighed.

"If it comes to that...there are options. This one is clever, as are you, and we could think of something. Perhaps feign your death."

"You'd lie to your Queen like that?" Ciileyn asked incredulously.

"She is not a perfect being. If it is the only way for you to live in peace, then perhaps a little deception is a fair price." Raz said and she believed him.

"Thank you."

**Author's Note:**

> just a short work featuring my most-played vestige, Ciielyn Applehollow. this certainly won't be the last i write of her, i love her far too dearly, but i dont imagine she'll get a long multi-chap fic like my skyrim ocs. we'll see though! also, while i have no qualms writing canon/oc relationships, i still havent decided if Ciielyn will truly get to romance Quen. for now it remains a respectful, one-sided pining deal
> 
> as always, all comments and constructive criticism are greatly appreciated and I hope you have a wonderful day/night!!!


End file.
